Ok, I couldn't, for the short and now ignorant life of me understand how people get by with a job that require them to do nothing for an entire length of 12 hours. I wish I know, considering I'm now, also stuck in the same plight. It's absolutely horrible, made my head hurt and reduced me a kid who suffered from a series of mental traumas. I know, I know, I have to stick with me and the job, however bad it is. No one needed the dough more than I do. More work needs to be done, a debt to return, a birthday gig I could do without...and my parents. I am broke even before I got the money and it never change.
You could never guess who came to me last night - J. Yeap, the ever charming prince of Spain, whom I now know a little bit more about. Last night, however short it was, made me heave a tiny sense of relief, only because I'm not the one he so very much ADORED. He likes that word a lot, used it whenever he could. It's like that word have turned salvation for him. It's something that helps him express stuff, I guess. And at the same time, I know how much he's doing to NOT be as aggressive as a man who so strongly believes that he has finally found The One but still, I was taken aback.
The One that he so adored, more than his own benefits, is one born with insatiated thirst for knowledge and freedom and much more. One only temporarily restrained by the invisible depths of imagination, vivid brain activity and a vigorously pounding heart of a human, it's an understatement to say she needs someone at least on par with her. Now I think I know why she thinks she couldn't be in a committed relationship. It was really selfishness but not the wrong kind. As far as I know, J wants to be that person, that person who no longer has a place to live but to stay, and dealing with impossible surges of emotions til' he became numb. J will do it for love. J will do it for life, his own and E's.
I don't really know a lot about him but he came across, in an instant, incredibly fragile and vulnerable and kinda stuck in a hole that he had willingly and very aggressively dug for himself. It's called Love. And if Love ever needed a fresh pair of cornea(s), this would be a perfect time. I worry about him a lot. He's doing too much not for himself, although it looks like it is on the superficial surface and I don't know, I wish he would have seen the whole thing differently...and who knows, things might just flow a little easier, and on everyone else.
S.H.E's Rendition of 情人, originally by Beyond
刘德华 - 爱如此神奇
Pink - Leave Me Alone
Stefanie Sun - E-Lover
王力宏 - 星期六的深夜
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