So yeah, I love to dwell, practically made it a profession but so what? This is me and nobody should care how I lead it. I could finally shed the pretense and show people who I really am and that they could just take it or leave it. If you think I'm terrible with this negativity and whatnot, then I am. I no longer wanna impress or try to belong or seek an alignment or worse, approval. I could lose friends and if they must go then I suppose they must. How do I try to explain what you can't know about? Why do I wanna waste my breath on you if all you fucking do is tell me what to do otherwise?

I gonna admit, I may be the last person brimming with positivity and that I don't believe in it anymore. I'm not sure if I ever believed in it but that doesn't necessarily automatically made me poster child for negativity. I just don't expect good things to happen is all. I don't try to bring anyone down with what I feel but only what is good for them, or at least works, in that moment. I tell people nice things about the future because unlike myself, they had it in them to believe in good things and I wanna promote that. I just want people to be happy.