Monday, December 31, 2007

Twenty08 for Real

Dear Quiet World and Beloved Love,
It's 10 to 1am when I started this entry. Everyone's out there having fun, being with the people they love, just coming down from a high of embracing a new year. It's actually twenty08, can anyone like believe that? I mean, I've been here on this Earth, a part of this mortality coil for 22 wicked years. Why do you think that is?

I'm not celebrating or doing any of the countdown thing, obviously, even if I had a television. I'm not like that. I don't like crowds; I specially enjoy the comfort of my chair and sitting in front of the computer burning my eye sockets and brain away, working on some proposals that I have been procrastinating. The only major countdown that I was remotely a part of was for Millenium and that is like what, 8 years ago?

Everything I do, I do alone, so the fun's all burnt out. It's no more life when it's without Tara. I will say that even if you would point a gun at me. I might even actually for a spilt second welcome it. Everyone around me just wants me to move on, to liking guys, to being heterosexual, to getting married and giving birth the right way. I appreciate it, truly but it's not going to happen anytime soon, guys.

Lord J was supposed to be this ever-forgiving sunshine guy, as long as the child showed true repentence for whatever wrongs he/she did and possessed a desire to spread good. My brother and a couple of good friends think I will burn in hell, maybe I'll make that my new year resolution - note to self: stray from hell. Well, if I am going to burn in hell, make it a quick one.

May the Good in This World Spread like Wild Fire...Happy New Year, Kids

Saturday, December 29, 2007

Chef/Chair?

I hate this, this whole getting stuck at a crossroad that is your life and with a whole shitload of baggages, mental and physical and without a fucking clue what to do to move on. I had a 2 weeks holiday from school and I took that opportunity to working in the kitchen at my first hotel, the Four Seasons Hotel, Singapore. Initially I was excitied and anticipative, the way I always seemed to start off by but by the end of the stint, which was officially today at 6pm, I'm left with questions that I do not have any fucking answers for.

I always know how inadequate I am, in terms of competencies, knowledge and skills about the culinary world. I am just playing whatever hands I'm dealt with by J himself. I know that if I wanna get a headstart, now's a good time for I have an endless stretch of road to be embarking on. During one of my Wine and Beverage tutorials, the tutor was shooting questions regarding the previous chapters and with most of us not having the answers for, you could see how despondent he was. And quickly with a rebut that I pretty much just shoot off from my mouth, I told him we'll be armed with whatever vital knowledge by the time we're his age. And as quickly, he found hope and I saw it reflected in his eyes. It's amazing what I can do.

I don't know if I'm on the right track, I don't know if i'm a chef by career and by life. I like to cook, I just don't like being told to cook, the way I don't write for competitions. I am still lacking in my fundamentals and I really need the whole 'practice makes perfect' biblical crap. I am willing to do it, I just need space. I didn't have a good time there at the hotel because I am still so new and well, incompetent. I kept getting into people's way and I can't get myself in the usual rthym for things to naturally happen and progress like I could in school. And that is one of those things that I couldn't get around and it haunts me. I wanted to be happy with what I do so I have to be good. Right now I am not happy nor in any way good. And that's when the thought of quitting culinary and getting into psychology came in majorly. It's almost as if a ram has ran into me and not by accident. I've been thinking about it for days and I am still looking at the cons and not weighing the pros as yet. My school is offering a Diploma in Pyschology and I took the fundamentals of pyschology at the end of my first year and I have loved it like a second nature. I was kinda mad when I realized the school was offering a new dipolma and by some wicked twist of fate, I would have been otherwise eligible and I could be doing what I really like. It's no longer 'I'm doing this because I have to', you know? And the cons weigh heavily on my frail heart.

Taking on a new semester meant retaking every bloody module I've so narrowly passed in my freshman years and I'm not looking forward to doing Economics, Marketing, and Fundamentals of Whatnots again. Right now where I stand, I'm left with until March where I would start my 5 month attachment and then be graduating in 2009. And I would be officially working then. I would then earn whatever I have to pay for my degree course in whatever it would be, or if that doesn't happen, I would working in a restaurant that is privately owned by some risk-taking individual who happened to have some dough to spare. I don't like dealing with corporate politics and degressions in ranks at international hotels or restaurants i've just worked at. If I am cooking, I am only cooking for pleasure, in monetary units and spiritual. And then I'll travel, take off into a new world I know nothing about.

On the other hand, I think I like pyschology and a lot. I'll get all researchy-mode to remember and understand all the theories and hypothesises and such. I'll talk to a person whose life's temporarily or permanently derailed in a chair. I really don't know. I hate to think I'm just feeling these shit because of a temporary setback...that I know I can overcome with time and
practice.

It shook me up badly when people would call me Chef Ashley, because I wouldn't have a clue if they are calling me.

Lots to Get Off Of

"When I was young and knew everything
And she a punk who rarely ever took advice
Now I'm guilt stricken, sobbing with my head on the floor
Stop a baby's breath and a shoe full of rice now
I can't be held responsible
Cause she was touching her face
I won't be held responsible
She fell in love in the first place
For the life of me I cannot remember
What made us think that we were wise and
We'd never compromise
For the life of me I cannot believe
We'd ever die for these sins
We were merely freshmen
My best friend took a week's vacation to forget her
His girl took a week's worth of Valium and slept
Now he's guilt stricken sobbing with his head on the floor
Thinks about her now and how he never really wept he says
We've tried to wash our hands of all of this
We never talk of our lacking relationships
And how we're guilt stricken, sobbing with our heads on the floor
We fell through the ice when we tried not to slip, we'd say"

"因为还是会
窗前站好一会儿
月色明媚所以舍不得睡
不久前她还在我周围
寂寞的气味不去
在空气里头流动
这个房间闹哄哄一些时候
回忆有她多(就)生动
有时候觉得没什么不同
可能从来没忘过
那快乐生活
拥有比遗憾的事件来得多
有时候想放手向现实低头
以后就重新来过
却没有把握
因为还是会
有想她的一股冲动"

I once told a person that things, relationships between people do not break; they are merely changed. Everyone has been through break-ups, boyfriends/girlfriends/partners/group mates etc and some has been through what I would call the ultimate break up, a loved one separated by death and only kept alive through memories. And the two song lyrics kinda symbolized that and how I feel with what I feel and how I could deal with it. And I wish I am writing this with a heart that has felt calm.


I've got tons in my head that I needed to get out from so it is going to be long update. You don't have to read if you don't want to. I know nobody who reads about me.

The world lost Tara when I was like almost 16, now I'm 21. It has been only been 5 years or rather, it has ALREADY been 5 years, whichever way it's up to you to decide and who you ask. I was in my last year in high school obviously and I was a darn bad grader. I couldn't do any of my 9 subjects except for languages which I didn't have to put in effort for. Now I wish I have taken like Japanese or French or Italian then, since it looked like I've a knack for languages or something. Anyway, I couldn't tell you how I even got through those 4 years in school being so horribly inadequate. My self-confidence was at its lowest, and personally I looked nothing short of crap. And I didn't even know the term 'homosexual'. I was that ignorant but somehow happy with odd reasons. Some say their time in high school were their happiest, I can't say I felt the same. It's a never-ending nightmare that is still rearing its head once in a while.

Her name was Liesl Tara Oppenheim and it took me a while to remember and to spell. (I'm glad I finally got it :P) She's, obviously of some quite complicated heritage which I can never imagine and never got figured out but I think it's cool and pleasantly wonderful. Liesl's an Austrian name, that I learnt from watching the musical 'Sound of Music' and I can't decide if Oppenheim's a German last name but it is the name of a German city. But you know what, the name doesn't matter. I called her Tara because nobody knows exactly how to pronounce her other names correctly at first glance and that nobody being me, decided on the easiest one. Her friends called her Lis. The Britons would called her TA-RA while me being more of an American influence called her "TEAR-RA", which I think I loved more. She's born 16 October 1984 in Germany so she would have been 24 by now. She had a older brother with a goatee called so very uncharacteristically Donny which I think was short for Donald. It's so weird and darn comical. Who could live with the name Donald, I know I couldn't. Her mom passed away when she was 17 from brain cancer and life has been shit then on, what with her abusive father and crazy brother and a crazier clan of relatives. Tara was brought up brainwashed by her bastard of a father that all women in the family would be submissive and be at their absolute beck and call and that anything else like education was just plain redundant. And Tara bought the whole work indeed. The girl has got so much talent and good in her that that shit her men would feed her couldn't even dream to be on par.

Anyway, after her mother passed, by the way the only good soul in the entire tree, Tara applied for scholarship to leave Germany, or rather, to leave her family. I couldn't remember the details of the scholarship but it brought her to me or Singapore. She took Greek Art, Literature, Sociology, Psychology, Maths, a whole shitload lessons of English, and I didn't think she could ever succeed in Sciences but she was incredibly naturally talented when it came to remembering names of strange herbs and stuff which always seemed to be in ancient Latin. God knows where she found those information but she did, all right. She had this collection of jars and bottles filled with the most exotic plants and powders and whatnot. And she could never get me to remember their names and what they could do. But they were meant to do good, I don't know.

I would normally just tell people that I met Tara in school and that she's my senior and such because I didn't wanna have to explain the why and how and whatever. That how we met, of course doesn't matter. I can't quite frankly remember and that is my wrong. The part where she and I were still alive is fading away, and I have said umpteen times how frightening that is for me. I don't wanna forget but I can't remember either and it made me feel like a selfish person. If ever comes a day where I would forget about Tara, I would really just die.

There are times where I thought 'ok, she's died, I should move on because that's what normal people do' and many a time I would say to myself 'ok, we've talked this out, you've promised, there is no way you could ever go on without her and you know that in your very core.' I used to be really furious about finding out the why and how, about getting resolutions. Why she died was due simply to human means, which to me is as ironic as it can get but absolutely sense-ful as well. I don't know how to move on without light, without love, without guide, without feeling so much of the warmth of Tara at night. Her voice, the color of her intense blue eyes, her long honey blond hair which she inherited from her mother no doubt and her flawless pale skin and savory lips. I don't know how to deal with it. I am just this stupid. That deadly reliance is still in play today, and it is still hurting me badly, cutting me up like a loaf of bread and while I absolutely adore baguettes. All these years, I still don't know how to shake it away, to find my own direction and light to follow. I must have been born blind.

I can't sleep quite right at night, I stop smiling but I'm always happy for someone else, and I cry a shitload, (I don't anymore) and half the time, I don't know what I'm looking at. I wanted to escape, to break away but I was often just abandoned and left behind once people are done with me. I'm only left out to lick my own bleeding wounds and to find some way to stand and walk again...

I am born gay and would go on to die tattooed and still gay. A week ago, it struck me that I might be getting tattooed because it's a way to deal with insecurities and stuff that is life. It's always great to feel nice about yourself, to feel happy with choices you have made and crazy things you've said. It's not always nice when I don't feel that. I wanted to get tattoos when I was like 12 and way before and after that. I've always been seen with Ash-made masterpieces on my left hand because I'm a right-hander. And I only use this particular Pilot brand black ink pen. I think it's great. Getting tattoos isn't an impulsive thing for me. I believed in the various properties of tattoos as much as I know I'm gay. Tattoos help to deal, to heal, to move on, to remember things/people, to forget some other not so good things/people, an open statement that life can and should be darn well better and that you rock. There are of course people who are drunk and decided on a bad tattoo on a bad night out but I'm not like those people. I would never get myself drunk, much less get a horrible horrible tattoo. Walking on the streets with tattoos made me a walking exhibition and dartboard. People look and stare, people make remarks and ask silly questions just so they could make more remarks and it's so human. I enjoy being lavished with that kind of attention, even if the word seems such a big word, I think most tattooed people do. But sometimes, I'm tired of that kind of awkward attention and I would go out all covered up and just blend in with other non-tattooed people. It's less exhausting that way and since most of the time, I'm by myself on the streets.

Coming back to insecurities, I think having tattooed imbued me with some kind of superiority and that I'm different. And that actually compensated for some degree, my rock-bottom self-confidence. People might diss me for it, some people may think that it's great and whatever it is, I'm special. No one is going to take that away from me.

Sunday, December 23, 2007

Perhaps

Been up the entire nightWondering if I would better off without you Just stay here with me, won't you? Lie to me just so I could feel the morning light beaming downStay the night just so I would sleep sound Restless days and nights I've walked aimlesslyTears in my eyes, without lightAnd I'm so tired, to my bones, I'm down on my broken knees, strippedAnd I don't know where else to go, what else to do anymoreStay here with me, darling just so I could breathe and singSpin me a story just so I would dance till the lights go outTake me along a bloody rideI can't be left behind
Maybe there is another life out thereMaybe we were together then and you not deadMaybe I've stopped living my life
It's like I can't breathe, It's like I'm blindI'm addicted to you, to your eyes, to your smile(I'm hooked on you I need a fix I can't take it Just one more hit I promise I can deal with it I'll handle it, quit it Just one more time, then that's it Just a little bit more to get me through this) And I've given up on this lifeWith no glory, with no beliefs
Perhaps another soul like you's out therePerhaps it's meant that I remained so lostPerhaps fate just wannna pull a fast one Perhaps, it wouldn't be so cold
I've been thinking if there is a reason for thisA rhyme to make good senseIf I've done something bad, if I'm never good enoughIf I should just vanish into thin air
Am I supposed to just get over this shit?Am I supposed to just forget and get it out of my head?I am just me...and you made me

Thursday, December 20, 2007

Ha, Expectations.

[And I wanna believe you, When you tell me that it'll be ok, Ya I try to believe you, But I don't When you say that it's gonna be, It always turns out to be a different way, I try to believe you, Not today, today, today, today, today...I don't know how I'll feel,tomorrow, tomorrow, I don't know what to say,tomorrow, tomorrow Is a different day It's always been up to you,I t's turning around, It's up to me, I'm gonna do what I have to do, just don't Give me a little time, Leave me alone a little while, Maybe it's not too late, not today, today, today, today, today...I don't know how I'll feel, tomorrow, tomorrow, I don't know what to say, tomorrow, tomorrow Is a different day Hey yeah yeah, hey yeah yeah, and I know I'm not ready, Hey yeah yeah, hey yeah yeah, maybe tomorrow Hey yeah yeah, hey yeah yeah, and I know I'm not ready,Hey yeah yeah, hey yeah yeah, maybe tomorrow And I wanna believe you, When you tell me that it'll be ok, Yeah I try to believe you, Not today, today, today, today, today...Tomorrow it may change]

It’s a funny thing really, expectations and beliefs that totally get to people and be that of a wicked wicked wreck. Growing up, I had a lot of expectations and beliefs. No doubt I still hold them true to my heart and stood firmly my ground but I've covered myself with self-inflicted wounds inflicted mostly by broken promises and these so-called wonderful expectations. All cut up inside because I didn't wanna give up. I just wanna feel alive but yet I've never felt more vulnerable in my life. And it is so so painful. I can't even put it in words (so obviously I took someone else's).

After years of just feeling numb, I now have a wonderful person E, constantly feeding me with huge unattainable dreams, at least by my standards and to believe in them. 'They may be unrealistic but they are still 'realize-able', if only you would believe in them.' Well, these dreams are only realistic because they are for you. I thought I found salvation. Lies, were the words she has spoken with such steely faith. Faith that is now burning fiery holes inside of me, rendering me ashes as I fall so swiftly from great heights. And she doesn't even have to try. Ain't it all pretty and gray? She has her own right to life and for some reasons, she brings people along with the ride. She just do, whether she knows it or not and right now, this tall, charming guy hailing all the way from Spain has fallen deeply under her spell. And don't get me wrong, I've got no complaints about that, it's their lives, no way near mine. I'm merely an audience who got suck into the whole shit.

With expectations comes even greater disappointments, that I've learnt so well. And while I'm not the only person in this world who has lost the light of their world and existence, I sure seemed to be the only idiot who can't snap out of it. Instead, all this pain and sorrow and grieving has become of the mainstay of who I am. If I were ever human, the wonderful bundle of pain is oxygen and blood. I might have actually invited the bundle to stay. I am neither genuinely happy nor devastated about anything. I have never found the reason to smile anymore but lots to cry about. I gave in into the enthralling allure of silence without a fight yet on a good day I sometimes cling to whatever light that was offered, a thread of hope. And E gave me that thread of hope. That of course meant she could leave me out to bleed in cold darkness whenever she feels like. That why I can never blame her.

If she decides to move to Spain, i'll let her. I'll even visit her.

Words are just such patronizing bullshit...

You tried to show me the good things in life
But you are also the one who took it away

Saturday, December 8, 2007

Dear Fucking Santa...

I don't feel a fucking 100% right now.

So maybe a pre-Christmas wish list could do me some good.

I wish I could cry, even if I don't know why
I wish I could run, so far that even if I fall, even if I'm lost
I wish I could scream and shout and yell at everyone and anyone because I wanna
I want Tara alive and breathing in front of me, telling me it’s ok, that she’s back
I want to have tattoos all over my body because that's how I live
I want to be gay til' the day I die
And then I want the fucking world to fucking shut up about it
Can Santa do that for me?

Monday, December 3, 2007

Time Heals but Also Takes Away

These days I've been on a search, a lookout for certain things. I don't know exactly what I'm looking for but I know it's important. It could be a moment, a very short one to remind me of things, to remind me to feel things and say things, intelligent things.

I keep thinking that time is running out and that I'm not doing anything productive to justify that. Maybe it has something to do with my age, and what I've been through and is going through now. I want the good in things which I can't have, most of the time, I wasn't allowed. I don't even know what I'm writing about but I just feel like writing.

I wanted to write about her but there are things that are beginning to fade and I'm afraid of that. I'm afraid I wouldn't remember. And if I really forget, I forget. And I'll be alone. And she'll be gone. For good. I don't want her to go but I don't wanna be selfish. I can't talk about her to anyone because I can't. I have to get her back..