"Liesl, I haven't thought about you in (insert number of days). You should be glowing with pride. I took that route today, after my exams, after whatever was going on. The one where you left me, by my high school. It's under renovation right now. I stood by the traffic lights, teary-eyed yet so determined to follow the rule, looked my left and right and crossed like a good child but I couldn't. I couldn't wait for it. But you did. You waited, so patiently.

I miss you, but it's of a good kind, you know. I Love You. Still do. Will always do and you have a place in my heart, so huge you could never fathom. If it were real land, you could build a nation on it. I wanna move on so bad. I wanna think about you and your goodness without the rage and loss. I wanna love you again and myself. I think the mechanics are working pretty well in my head..and hopefully, it'll keep up its glorious work and keep those thoughts away. You're still here. I know you are."

下过雨后 我大口吸着清新空气
今天以后 要努力做全新的自已
过了限期 不再可伶兮兮
承认你已经 从我的世界走出去

回家的路 我梦见一望无际花海
真的感激 又看得见大自然美丽
不再哭泣 才能够看得清晰
我真的懂了 再也不会自暴自弃

再见过去 我们的足迹
相信印记将随时间淡去
那段相遇 心动 热恋 分离 我不会否定
因为它是我成长的日记

下过雨后 我大口吸着清新空气
今天以后 要努力做 全新的自已
不再哭泣 才能够看得清晰
我真的懂了 再也不会自暴自弃

再见过去 我们的足迹
相信印记将随时间淡去
那段相遇 心动 热恋 分离 我不会否定
因为它是我成长的日记

最后一次回头看才明白
原来伤心是旅程中必须经过的小镇
离开后 我更勇敢
再见过去 再见我和你
勇敢说再见就有勇气继续
会有 新的发现 新的经历 新谱的恋曲 原来我喜欢 这样的自已

© 黄湘怡, Stella 狂想曲 ~ Track 3, 再见过去 ~
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w2P2ZmVsWN4

Cold Mountain

"Guns are never useful

Oh god, that blue, it must have been painful

So very, very painful.

It was all written in her eyes

The truth reflected in the water down the good lady's well

Crows, black and noisy ones, and snow

Love has come home

He has.

The night before,

When a baby girl could have been born

They will keep playing it, the songs

Especially in the cold

"I'll marry you, I'll marry you, I'll marry you"

"I'll marry you, I'll marry you, I'll marry you"

Now they knew the journey was not all for naught

If only they could say the same about the war

One can only dare hope..."

I just caught Cold Mountain on TV a while ago and it was good film for those who and never gave up, despite the circumstances and in your face people. It is also largely about friendship and support, and kindness. It's not about for how long, it's about happening and having the moments, like diamonds, real or made up. In the middle of it, almost end, I had a feeling it wouldn't quite end up the way I pictured it. You know, the standard good ending where Inman, Jude Law's character comes back to Ada, Nicole Kidman's character and they live happily ever after. The ending shortchanged me there, when Inman died anyway but at least, fulfilled and validated and the couple gave birth to a baby girl named Grace Inman. And I really love Renée Zellweger's role in the film (won the Oscars Best Supporting Actress for it!) She was really cool, and her own story to tell in bits and pieces yet with absolute poignancy. She pretended not to care when in truth, she did and a lot. She loved her daddy, saved his life and in the process, her own..It's all in all a good film. You guys should watch it, or better yet, if you are affordable, go get the book and tell me if it's better.

Kudos to Whoever.

Ok, it's that time of year again where I stop and take a bearing and lay appreciation for all those whom I owe it to ( and big time!), and really kinda take a breath.

My life as a student is now seeing its not-so-bright end. I am not going nowhere with my current grades so I can't procrastinate no more and I have to just immerse myself fully into what I call 'the adult working world'. I don't know who I'll turn out to be, good or bad. At least for now, I am feeling ok. Yeah, I am feeling ok. You know, as good as one can be plus exam anxiety.

All right then.

Groupmates and schoolmates and drinking mates and strangers, I love you all and it's beyond any word I could possibly muster with my limited vocabulary. You guys made my world such a pretty picture. We overcame challenges within such short time span, had loads of fun and I was mad and frustrated for the littlest and stupidest things I can no longer bother remembering. I've been less than articulative my entire existence and it's probably my bad. I suck at expressing, especially love and friendship but I'll always, always, with my life be here when you need me. You guys can fucking count on that! I probably seemed nonchalant most of the time or I don't talk as much but I'm right here. Oh, I feel like a good cry, especially the 'love and friendship part'. Haha!! Embarrassing is all.

Anyway, I thank you guys and you guys know who you are, for pulling it through and putting it up with me. I'm really wouldn't be the first to wave and yell 'yes' if I had to bunk in or work with me. You guys are fucking courageous! I'm really just finding this experience a surreal one. I never seemed to believe in anything and I still don't. But you guys made me, trust in having fun in life in the midst of non-funness. I don't wanna say I've been through a lot, because then that will make me sound old when I'm not. But yeah, I'm still working out the kinks of life, trying to fix things, fix me and I will be as good as new in no time.

I have fear, so much of it I'm feeling selfish I can't share it. Haha! If wishes do come true, it will be pretty cool to just stay in school, and be protected from the pains of this world but then again, be careful what you wish for. They don't generally work the way you'd have cared for and often than not, you regret making them. I have simple wishes. I want all whom I have the honor to know and keep, good health, love, inner peace and strength and courage to do whatever they are doing. We better keep in close contact, just to check it the magic is working its all.

I love you guys.

Come Back to Bed

Still is the life
Of your room
When you're not inside
And all of your things
Tell the sweetest storyline

Your tears on these sheets
And your footsteps are down the hall
So tell me what I did
I can't find where the moment went wrong at all

You can be mad in the morning
I'll take back what I said
Just don't leave me alone here
It's cold, baby
Come back to bed
Come on back to bed

What will this fix?
You know you're not a quick forgive
And I won't sleep through this
I survive on the breath you are finished with

You can be mad in the morning
I'll take back what I said
Just don't leave me alone here
It's cold, baby
Come back to bed

You can be mad in the morning
Or the afternoon instead
But don't leave me 98 and 6 degrees of separation from you, baby
Come back to bed
Why don't you come back to bed

Don't hold your love over my head
Don't hold your love...

©John Mayer, Heavier Things~ Track 5, Come Back to Bed ~
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RqTJv06yuEA

http://www.haoting.com/musiclist/ht_6d4d63af79737cf3.htm