无论你肯或不肯
我都选择等
等到你结束好久 探险的旅程
要是没有寂寞陪衬
没有途中的灰尘
你怎会向往家门
你越是想要诚恳 其实越残忍
伪装不了你对我 漠视的眼神
你不许我听信永恒
不许我迷信我们
不许我奋不顾身
多想化成隐形的人 掩饰我伤痕
给你我的体温 好帮你驱走寒冷
看不见也能感受心疼
我想化成隐形的人 隐藏我的泪在翻滚
我在你凌乱世界 留下的指纹
对你是没心跳的一个吻
朋友都于心不忍 责备我愚蠢
但他们都回避我 执着的眼神
可知我对爱的虔诚
可知我迷信我们
可知我难得放任
多想化成隐形的人 掩饰我伤痕
给你我的体温 好帮你驱走寒冷
看不见也能感受心疼
我想化成隐形的人 隐藏我的泪在翻滚
我在你凌乱世界 留下的指纹
对你是没心跳的一个吻
多想化成隐形的人 掩饰我伤痕
给你我的体温 好帮你驱走寒冷
看不见也能感受心疼
我想化成隐形的人 隐藏我的泪在翻滚
我在你凌乱世界
留下的指纹 对你是没心跳的一个吻
©孙燕姿, 完美的一天 ~ Track 3, 隐形人 ~
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HybzJsSuGe4
Monday, December 29, 2008
Saturday, December 27, 2008
17 Reasons Why
I hope that some of you out there watches Showtime's The L Word. It's in her 5th season now; whether she'd be picked for a 6th is still a mystery. For you guys who have watched it and probably are loyal fans, I wouldn't have to explain the storyline or provide a blurb of some sorts. Anyway, they introduced this new character into the show in Season 4 named Jodi Lerner. She was portrayed by Marlee Matlin, an Oscar award winning actress who is profoundly deaf, a mother of 4 kids, a proud author of 3 books and she just starred in American's ABC's Dancing with the Stars, Season 6 in which she lasted for 6 weeks. She is possibly one of the most inspiring person I know but unfortunately, not personally (OK, this is not bordering perversion). Ok, I am obviously extremely into her right now.
I've just watched a film she starred in, and it also starred Jeff Daniels, another talented actor as her hearing husband and the story depicts a struggle within a very close-knitted family, whether to get their only son, Adam who developed deafness at 4 year old cochlear implants which would then allow him to hear sounds and maybe have a better chance in life. Marlee was Lauren Miller, Adam's mother and Dan, Jeff's character's loving wife. Lauren taught in a deaf school and was brought up by deaf parents who were really proud of what they called 'deaf culture' which coincidently I did a simple tutorial on for my Design in Culture class (I only watched the film after I handed in the tutorial so...) Dan wanted the implants for Adam because he wanted his kid all the opportunities life presented to a hearing person and especially because Adam was still young and remembered sounds. Lauren on the other hand was absolutely torn and struggling with that concept and the pressure her folks gave her. She didn't perceive deafness as an obstacle or a disability. A deaf person can still achieve anything and do whatever as desired except hear. (Marlee evidently believes in the same thing in reality) The couple eventually separated and was on trial for Adam's custody. The story ended, as far as I'm concerned, on a good note. Dan figured out that they didn't need a panel of judges/strangers to tell them who Adam goes home with or if being deaf or hearing is worth debating their pants off about...Dan loves Lauren and Adam, no matter what. So they got back together and the family leads a life just as they were supposed to, hearing AND not hearing. The film is called Sweet Nothing In My Ear. If you are interested, I could get you the link to the movie.
Back to The L Word, Jodi, Marlee's character is an awesomely talented and hot gay sculptor who was invited to guest-spot at Bette Porter's school where she is the Dean. Bette is played by Jennifer Beals, equally charming and very intellectual. In real life, the two have been best friends for 20 years. In the show, they met because of work and they eventually got into sort of a relationship that didn't quite work out in Season 5. Bette loved Jodi and Jodi loved her even more but Bette was more in love with her ex and the mother of her daughter, Tina. Before meeting Bette, Jodi didn't remotely believe in monogamy and kids but because of Bette, she happily changed herself and accepted that commitment to which Bette would come to fail her. The two characters were just fundamentally different.
I know everyone is just waiting for Bette and Tina to be reunited and ideally stay that way and for a long time as I was watching the show, I wanted the same thing too because they truly belong together. The couple was like an anchor and the safe place where fans can go to in the show. But the introduction of Jodi...it completely altered and wiped out my perception of Bette and Tina's reunion. I wanted Jodi for Bette. I am sure that the whole deafness thing has a lot to do with it because I just adored this particular culture and people. And Marlee, she is such a great, great, great actress. To derail a little, I've always wanted to pick up sign language because Liesl, my girlfriend, she was about 80% deaf and I really wanted to pick up her language like she picked up lip-reading and speaking. And finding out information about Marlee reignited that passionate spark in me. Anyway, this is just what I feel regarding the progress and direction of the show which I'm sure no one from the production will know. They aren't going to change the plot for me...perhaps that's why I'm not in a hurry to watch Season 5 because that's when the ugliest breakup of the century happens.
It sometimes amazes me how almost none of the core cast members are even homosexual or bisexual yet they portrayed the characters with such conviction. They are such talented bunch of women, very creative, and quick with their thinkings. I live for their dialogues, the words are always poignant and humorous and really just drives home, you know. Not to mention, they are pretty nice to look at, asthetically. You guys should watch the show, even if you aren't gay or whatever. To some people, the show will do very little if not, adversely affect their somehow already etched-in-stone (and wrong) perceptions of the gay people. To others, the show is almost like an answer to the prayers for more portrayals of gay people and topics and stuff. Personally, I find the show to be so incredibly fucked up and twisted that I didn't think I could bear watching but at the same time, those are the things that are really happening here, in this world and not just confined to Hollywood. People need other people to be honest so they could learn to do the same and this is what The L Word is all about. Honesty, integrity, love, hatred, and stuff...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dnllvFZMCDo
I've just watched a film she starred in, and it also starred Jeff Daniels, another talented actor as her hearing husband and the story depicts a struggle within a very close-knitted family, whether to get their only son, Adam who developed deafness at 4 year old cochlear implants which would then allow him to hear sounds and maybe have a better chance in life. Marlee was Lauren Miller, Adam's mother and Dan, Jeff's character's loving wife. Lauren taught in a deaf school and was brought up by deaf parents who were really proud of what they called 'deaf culture' which coincidently I did a simple tutorial on for my Design in Culture class (I only watched the film after I handed in the tutorial so...) Dan wanted the implants for Adam because he wanted his kid all the opportunities life presented to a hearing person and especially because Adam was still young and remembered sounds. Lauren on the other hand was absolutely torn and struggling with that concept and the pressure her folks gave her. She didn't perceive deafness as an obstacle or a disability. A deaf person can still achieve anything and do whatever as desired except hear. (Marlee evidently believes in the same thing in reality) The couple eventually separated and was on trial for Adam's custody. The story ended, as far as I'm concerned, on a good note. Dan figured out that they didn't need a panel of judges/strangers to tell them who Adam goes home with or if being deaf or hearing is worth debating their pants off about...Dan loves Lauren and Adam, no matter what. So they got back together and the family leads a life just as they were supposed to, hearing AND not hearing. The film is called Sweet Nothing In My Ear. If you are interested, I could get you the link to the movie.
Back to The L Word, Jodi, Marlee's character is an awesomely talented and hot gay sculptor who was invited to guest-spot at Bette Porter's school where she is the Dean. Bette is played by Jennifer Beals, equally charming and very intellectual. In real life, the two have been best friends for 20 years. In the show, they met because of work and they eventually got into sort of a relationship that didn't quite work out in Season 5. Bette loved Jodi and Jodi loved her even more but Bette was more in love with her ex and the mother of her daughter, Tina. Before meeting Bette, Jodi didn't remotely believe in monogamy and kids but because of Bette, she happily changed herself and accepted that commitment to which Bette would come to fail her. The two characters were just fundamentally different.
I know everyone is just waiting for Bette and Tina to be reunited and ideally stay that way and for a long time as I was watching the show, I wanted the same thing too because they truly belong together. The couple was like an anchor and the safe place where fans can go to in the show. But the introduction of Jodi...it completely altered and wiped out my perception of Bette and Tina's reunion. I wanted Jodi for Bette. I am sure that the whole deafness thing has a lot to do with it because I just adored this particular culture and people. And Marlee, she is such a great, great, great actress. To derail a little, I've always wanted to pick up sign language because Liesl, my girlfriend, she was about 80% deaf and I really wanted to pick up her language like she picked up lip-reading and speaking. And finding out information about Marlee reignited that passionate spark in me. Anyway, this is just what I feel regarding the progress and direction of the show which I'm sure no one from the production will know. They aren't going to change the plot for me...perhaps that's why I'm not in a hurry to watch Season 5 because that's when the ugliest breakup of the century happens.
It sometimes amazes me how almost none of the core cast members are even homosexual or bisexual yet they portrayed the characters with such conviction. They are such talented bunch of women, very creative, and quick with their thinkings. I live for their dialogues, the words are always poignant and humorous and really just drives home, you know. Not to mention, they are pretty nice to look at, asthetically. You guys should watch the show, even if you aren't gay or whatever. To some people, the show will do very little if not, adversely affect their somehow already etched-in-stone (and wrong) perceptions of the gay people. To others, the show is almost like an answer to the prayers for more portrayals of gay people and topics and stuff. Personally, I find the show to be so incredibly fucked up and twisted that I didn't think I could bear watching but at the same time, those are the things that are really happening here, in this world and not just confined to Hollywood. People need other people to be honest so they could learn to do the same and this is what The L Word is all about. Honesty, integrity, love, hatred, and stuff...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dnllvFZMCDo
Monday, December 22, 2008
每到夜晚, 我就习惯性失眠
脑海里模糊记忆就让它盘旋
只要是白天我就会沉睡
直到身边的一切不再继续
偶尔流下的眼泪
其实不必由谁来拭去
也不需任何人来加以安慰鼓励
因为我不相信奇迹
不相信童话里快乐生活一辈子的情节
更不相信自己复愈能力。。。
爱上写作、音乐的我
让我相信爱是对的
爱上文化、语言的你
让我知道爱是真的
有你爱上从前的我
让我明白到爱是无逻辑、没理由的
现在早已离开的你
让我深深体会到藏在内心顽固的任性
也让我体会到全宇宙的寂寞
我觉得自己真的好傻
付出不一定会结果
曾经拥有的也可能会消失
你没用的电话号码是时候删除了
你的旧地址也该忘了
把过去的照片、小贴纸、信件、礼物通通丢掉烧掉。。。
是不是就能当一切没有发生过
或许吧。。。
脑海里模糊记忆就让它盘旋
只要是白天我就会沉睡
直到身边的一切不再继续
偶尔流下的眼泪
其实不必由谁来拭去
也不需任何人来加以安慰鼓励
因为我不相信奇迹
不相信童话里快乐生活一辈子的情节
更不相信自己复愈能力。。。
爱上写作、音乐的我
让我相信爱是对的
爱上文化、语言的你
让我知道爱是真的
有你爱上从前的我
让我明白到爱是无逻辑、没理由的
现在早已离开的你
让我深深体会到藏在内心顽固的任性
也让我体会到全宇宙的寂寞
我觉得自己真的好傻
付出不一定会结果
曾经拥有的也可能会消失
你没用的电话号码是时候删除了
你的旧地址也该忘了
把过去的照片、小贴纸、信件、礼物通通丢掉烧掉。。。
是不是就能当一切没有发生过
或许吧。。。
Sunday, December 14, 2008
People just leave now, don't they?Just walking away, turning that tiny corner and vanishing into thin airBecause that's what they do bestAnd no one knows where they goI am nobody's businessThey don't leave nothing but a bunch of griefNot a single syallable on a piece of crushed paper or money burntAnd you are just here, waitingHow does anyone do this?Wake up and go to sleep, Don't they ever make a sound, maybe cry at night, yell a little?Look for their true faces in the mirror, never finding itPretend it's not all over because it's really isPretend it's all over when you are still cryingWhat is real and what is dream?What keeps you moving when everything else stops?Can you please tell me a story?
The one in which nobody dies in.
Please, just hear and lead me,
Down that very long aisle.
I will be happy.
Could you sing me a line, a familiar one, so I’ll know why.
Why she left,
Me here.
The one in which nobody dies in.
Please, just hear and lead me,
Down that very long aisle.
I will be happy.
Could you sing me a line, a familiar one, so I’ll know why.
Why she left,
Me here.
Thursday, December 11, 2008
你望着已被世人遗忘的怀表在等待着回忆着什么?
你背上沉重却柔软的翅膀都僵硬了，无法挥动飞行带你环游世界了。
你不觉可惜、后悔吗?
被染红的丝带毫不留情缠绕着的脚踝也无法逃脱走开了吧?
被自己的倔强困在伤痛与绝望的悬崖上是不是太傻了?
她是你极度孤独与寂寞的隐形分隔线。
只有她的离开才能让你体会到真正失去自己的滋味。
是谁告诉你这愚蠢可笑的传说，什么说了再见就会再见?
我不能相信，却也不忍怀疑。
一旦怀疑了，我们所有的一切就会消失。
可如果我相信了，你又在哪里?
心虽然早已停止跳动，却还血流不止。
早只是个空罐子的脑袋就像个没知觉、过得醉生梦死的活死人，冷血地过着无趣的生活，不知在期待着什么。
我不想怨天尤人，可是心真的好痛，好痛。
装着若无其事的样子继续欺骗、背叛自己，那又怎样?
这世上再也不会出现第二你，也不会有我。。。
隐隐作痛的伤口似乎这辈子都无法愈合了。
在某个星期二的夜晚里，她对我说，能活着就是幸福，就是在这星球上所有答案、道理和理由。 痛也只是个微小的提醒。
她说每个人都背负着一个任务，手里心里藏着一份神秘的礼物。
她要我带着那份礼物和她曾给过我的爱感动下一个遇到的女孩， 让她了解活着、爱着的好。
我不知道做不做的到，可是我不能让她失望。
因为我爱她。
因为总有一天我会再见到她。
OK, so I don't generally do this, not in Mandarin anyway. But I thought I give it a try. This is a picture I took with my cellphone the last time I dropped by Kinokuniya. It's a cover page of some kind of graphic collection or comic book collection. I love it the moment I saw it and I kept it as my cellphone wallpaper. It didn't really try to convey anything to me when I first looked at it but as time goes, as I looked at the picture more, words finally came...
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