Christina Perri's A Thousand Years

"I have died everyday waiting for you
Darling don't be afraid I have loved you
For a thousand years
I'll love you for a thousand more

And all along I believed I would find you
Time has brought your heart to me
I have loved you for a thousand years
I'll love you for a thousand more"

Happy Valentine's Day, my love

Dear sweetheart, dear love, dear soulmate and best friend, dear partner and my dearest Shufen.

There are so many names I could use but nothing comes close to describing what you truly mean to me but I will try.

From the very first moment I laid my eyes on you, I wanted you. I was in awe. I was dumbfounded. I was clueless. I was a coward. I became distracted and detached from reality. For a spilt second, you have taken my world apart and put it back together. From that moment on, all my eyes could see is you. All I could breathe is the peculiar scent you carry. All I could feel and touch and taste is you. All I could think about is you. You bring colors into my world, fill my ears with music and laughter, and compel me to dream up vivid imageries of what life with you can be. Tell me, are you a blurry water paint that's just gonna be washed away when the rain comes again? Or are you the perfect portrait, constructed from acrylic and oil, and will stay to spend the next 60 years with me because that's how long an acrylic painting takes to completely dry?

They say that silence is the loudest at night. It envelops me, it compels me. It's when my wildest fantasies come true, it's why I love, why I yearn for you to be in my arms and why I don't think I can fall asleep without having you lie next to me. I want to make you laugh, anything at all, to keep that smile shining on your face and your laughter in my ears. I wanna share a downpour with you, a thunderstorm in the middle of a weekday. I wanna spend the brightest of Sunday mornings, gloomy afternoons and rainy evenings with you in bed, doing absolutely nothing productive cause that's what Sundays are invented for. I wanna look up at a darkened sky and have you tell me the difference between planets and stars that have died a long time ago. I want you to hold my hand in yours, look into my eyes and smile a crooked grin. I wanna listen to you whisper "I love you" under the most unexpected circumstance and fill my heart to brim. I wanna come home to you after a long day so we could share a hot shower and supper on the kitchen counter. I wanna go to bed with you every night with my hand in yours. I'll gladly give up my end of the bed for you. I wanna wake up every morning to your kisses and grins and have you whisper "good morning, my love." and you can tell me how much you love me, the places we have been in your dreams and the crazy things we have done, like making sweet love along my kitchen aisle as the world watches. I will share with you my dreams but then again, you would already know who's in it.

You.

Still, I constantly miss and crave for you.

I don't believe it's possible to get over you or get too much of you. Forever is no longer just a state of mind. Not when every kiss is a first kiss. Not when we are drawn and folded into each other, and it felt like it's the first time we have ever experienced intimacy. I had wanted to die and I might have been dead for a long time. I might have forgotten the virtues of being alive but secretly I have been mending my heart and soul. I have been preparing myself for the light at the end of the tunnel. I was learning to love myself for you, just so I could love you, like you deserve to be loved. At 25, I may be a child but a child's love and affection is love and humanity at its purest.

So let me keep you close to my heart. Stay with me. Laugh and cry alongside me. Let me hold your hand as we walk along the streets. Let us share a kiss whenever our faces come too close. Rest your head on my chest and listen to my heart race. See the world with me.

Just breathe.

Just be.

Let me love; teach me, teach me how to love you.

Because I love you.

Because I truly do.

Happy Valentine's Day, my love.